Inner Voices - Part 7

7Feb/125

It’s ok… a message brought to you by me.

I am spending some much needed time in my art journal lately. Trying to process. Trying to prettyfy some stuff that happens.

Here is a page I made today (it was already dark, I may take a better picture *or not*):

On the other side of the spread is a sketch of a Nixie, Just a sketch... no shading, no color. And I did not know if I wanted the two pages to be separated or a spread. I still don't know actually.

It says:

It's ok..:

to be mad
to be sad
to wanna give up sometimes
to feel like today is the worst one in your life
to have big hope and small dreams
to scream at the top of your lungs just to LET it GO
to smile when you feel like breaking down
to join your hands in a prayer to Whoever would just listen to you
to cry and ask for help

It's ok to have and express whatever emotion pass through you

(it just means you're alive)

If I am sharing this page with you, it's only because I feel like I was just the tool for the message. The channel so people could read these words. So people could know it is ok to feel whatever they feel.

I am struggling with my emotions right now. Not understanding them. Not being successful in processing them the way I wish I would. And I guess someone may feel the same somewhere and that this «permission slip» would reach someone who needed it.

Tagged as: Art Journaling, Be 5 Comments

3Feb/123

Gratitude Friday 02/03/2012

Gratitude Friday is a weekly ritual I started in order to focus on all the small and big positive things that happened during my week. I invite you to join me, you'll see how much being thankful can change your life. If you want to know more about it, read my introduction post.

Hello !

February... ok, I won't tell it every new month of the year but honestly I don't see where January went. Maybe it is because my mind is currently so full of everything, I don't notice each day that comes after the others.

January made me realize how important it is to thank for everything we receive, good and less good. There's a positive message in everything that is thrown our way.

This week, I am thankful for:

Open-hearted discussion with this girlfriend that matters so much to me. And our mutual decision to take care of our friendship.
Today is Cheridoo's payday, I can finally breathe again (and buy food).
Nothing is a coincidence I guess... I wanted to finally sign up for Flora Bowley's class first thing this morning, and the registration for this session (that begins next monday) is now closed. It was not yesterday. Next term: June 2012.
Mamounette (ie my Mom).
Despite this stupid wrist/arm that has me suffering for more than 10 days now, I was able to paint and work this week. It's weird how the only moment I notice I feel relief in my pain is when I paint.
My girls that cover me with love and sweet words («Mom cooks the best meals in the world» «Mom is the bestest artist in the whole universe»... even if it is from my daughters' point of view, they honestly feel what they tell me).
The tv show Supernatural. Oooooh yes we waited forever to finally give in and watch it. We have several season to catch up with but this is good. And it is filmed nearby
I am currently reading the second book of The Hunger Games, Catching Fire. This is amazing. I am glad I waited for the trilogy to be completely released before reading it. I hate having to wait for sequels to come (and honestly, they all do several-book series now. Tsss). And this is something I can share with Mamounette as she's read the first two books while she was here. I am trying to convince my husband to read them as well. Here is the link for Lien pour the trailer.
My friends Kira that jumped on Skype to talk to me after something I poster on facebook. It is good to know I can vent with someone that totally gets what I am going through. And to know she cares.
It is auite sunny outside so I am walking in my neighborhood just to get some fresh air.
My friend Anu that listens to me patiently and support me.
My friend Aurore that will give me skirts she does not wear anymore.
My husband, who simply is my perfect match.

I realized I like to end my Gratitude Friday blogpost with some pictures from my week:

There is still time to sign up for 21 Secrets, that will open its doors in April. You won't regret learning from the 21 of us.
Click on the image to learn more about it, and maybe sign up (note: the teachers are given an affiliate link so people can sign up using it and we are paid a percentage of your fee. I would love if you'd use my link above to sign up.)

If you wrote your Gratitude Friday on your blog, don't forget to enter your NAME and URL below so I'm notified and can come to read you (you can also join by commenting this post):

Tagged as: Gratitude Friday 3 Comments

1Feb/123

Paving Our Path, February 2012

Today is the already the third edition of this monthly section, Paving Our Path, I do with my friend Anu from My Courageous Life. We write our hopes and wishes for the month becoming. Just paving our path with good intentions.

What a month January has been ! We've seen my mom go back to France (where she lives) after having her by our sides for three very great months and honestly, it's been ten days or so now and it still feels empty without her...

While I am typing this, I am noticing something that is strange: I have no idea what I did write for my previous letters to the Universe. I can not tell you if what I wished for actually was granted or not (I will check though). This is what I call letting go (me the Queen Of I Keep everything tightly attached emotionally)

And from this month on, we have a pretty button to accompany our blogposts, yaaay !
I will add Anu's link as soon as I have it to share with you.

Dear Universe,

My heart feels heavy, and as February is the Month of the year where Love is all around, please fill me in; I promise to give back as much as I can, to anyone who needs it.
Please, help me to focus and inspire me to make the best class I could for 21 Secrets. I hope to help people heal by sharing my own process...
Give me the strength to go on my path of a better life for myself, better eating, exercising despite the fibro that seems to get harder and harder on me as the time passes. Help me to accept that pregnancies changed my body, and that what it looks like now after having given birth twice at now 26yo is not put into stone, I can still make it something I enjoy looking at in the mirror, a skin I feel good being inside of.
If you can send some clarity my way, some signs you know I will understand, feel free to do so. I am open to receive them now.
I feel lonely most of the time, a bit of company from someone more that 6 years old would be appreciated. Have you seen how I try to get off my butts to reach out ?

Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.

Love,
Nolwenn

Tagged as: Paving Our Path 3 Comments

30Jan/123

New {Painting In Motion} video, Fierce

Hello !

I know it has been quite a long time since I shared with you an In Motion video (either Art Journaling or Mixed Media related). I have faced many technical difficultied in the last month or so, and several videos had to be aborted during the process. I meant they were just not meant to be.

I am a tidbit nervous to share this painting with you. Because it is like nothing else I've created before, but I still feel like this is me. I have no idea what this creature is. Nor why I used these specific symbols at the end.

I had a lot of fun playing with texture and love the result. Ready ? Here it is..:

You may know how much I love using stencils, and to date my favorites are made by the company The Crafter's Workshop, and I just swoon over those designed by Julie Fei-Fan Balzer (totally fangirling her, yea...). And I have the chance to have discovered a fantastic local scrapbook store that accept to special order stuff for me, the nonscrapbookerbutveryloyal customer

I think that I became more Fearless in my creativity thanks to Connie, and I will never thank enough for her class BIG that changed everything for me. Before, my creative process involved the search of perfection, intensive planning of what would the artwork will look like (and of course, this bad feeling when it never did look like what I had in mind). But since her class, I found how to free myself from all those high expectations I use to have. Not that I don't care, I still do, but I am enjoying the ride, involving all the ups and downs of creativity.

I feel like I was in a kind of transe while doing this painting, even if it was recording, because the creature that emerge stroke me only when the painting was done, the camcorder off. What IS that ?!?
And of course, an army of Gremlins decided to show off: «you are crazy» «this thing does not look like anything» «people will think you are not normal» blablablablaaaaaaaaaaa
I got scared to share this painting, and her video. But decided to shake the Fear off and do it anyway. So here it is:

I hope you enjoyed it

Tagged as: Painting In Motion, Video 3 Comments

25Jan/121

Currently in the making

I thought I would share a tidbits of what's been on my art table lately. I am not ready yet for the big reveals but... I really want to share some of it with you all.

Today, something weird happened. It's been a while since I last recorded and shared a video, after several attempts that ending being big failures (camera's battery dieing in the middle of the recording, me having to cut it off because of some duties implied by being a mom........), I decided today would be the day and nothing could actually stop me.

And I just abandonned myself in the painting... trusting something positive will come out of it. But honestly, I would never have thought of THIS. You'll understand when the video will be ready (tomorrow I hope). What ended on my canvas is either abstract or a Nixie, I don't know how to call it yet. But I simply LOVE it, which makes me feel a bit ill-at-ease for a reason I don't understand yet (oooh personal message to my dear friend Anu: it has a mouth !!)

Here is a sneak peak of it: