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You know that I am a list maker and lover. In the past few months, I have been doing daily + weekly check-ins. Therefore, Mondays are focused on figuring out what I want to achieve and especially how I want it to make me feel.

Due to several reasons, I tend not to be reaching my goals was hard is because I don’t have any accountability… so maybe sharing publicly here would push me to take actions.

How do I want to feel ?

✰ I want to feel connected. Connected to my Inner Self. Connected to the Source (the Universe/God/whatever you personally call it). Connected to my family. Connected to a tribe I am trying to gather.
✰ I want to feel in the flow. Of course, I want to be in the flow regarding my creativity, but with my loved ones as well.
✰ I am inviting ease in my everyday. I wish to lessen the level of stress that puts me down on an everyday bases.
✰ I am also calling kindness in. I need to make better decisions when it comes to how I react.

Most of all, every single day is a new day allowing me to choose which way to go.

In the same way, what feelings are you focusing on this coming week ?

A little bonus: Monday morning tunes:

I really hope my habit will stick and that I will share my Gratitude Friday here again, weekly.

First, I want to thank all the people who took the time to comment either here or on the social media. It brings me so much joy to read your own list. Everytime I read one, I take a few minutes to send you a little gentle energy.

This week is my birthday week, which I love. Even though my body decided to go against me and to put me in full fibro flare-up. A flare up means I can’t focus, I can’t function, I become bitchy (even more than my usual regular self).

This week, I am thankful for:

✼ The love I receive
✼ The good teacher my 7th grader has this year and her studying hard paying off
✼ Pain meds
✼ My Sister, Mindy, and her online classes (feeling witchy anyone ?)
✼ Getting messy in my Art Cave, the freedom I have to create
✼ This piece of writing by Carrie-Anne Moss that resonates so well with my own epiphany
✼ Hot Epsom salt baths in the middle of the day
✼ Family coming from far away to spend time with us
✼ Canning food
✼ The new album from Macklemore
✼ The trust invested in me to create beautiful meaningful videos.

And you, what comes into your mind when you start the sentence “today, I am thankful for……” ?

Share in the comments and let me hold your joy with you.

A few pictures
  

Happy birthday to me 🙂 I love celebrating birthdays. Not just my own, but my loved ones’ too. Celebrating birthdays is part of my love language, one day each year I show how big and deep my love is. But I am a Virgo and it means that I usually have too high expectations (oops).

This year somehow feels different than the 31 previous ones. I can’t explain yet how come. Maybe it is because of the New Moon or maybe because I decided to stop giving a shit for what I should only let go.

I am quirky. I am not your average “well in all aspects” mom. I am unperfect. I am paradoxical. I am too much and not enough. I am creative. I am a blank canvas. I am a storyteller. I am not broken. I am a neverending dreamer. I am a daughter of the Moon. I am deeply passionate. I will love you as no one had loved you before. I am the stories yet to be written. I am fucked up. I am the Light and the Darkness combined.

I am so much more than what words could convey. I am in pain everyday in a body that fails me, but I refuse to let it define me.

32. Now is the time to stop being apologetic. Forever.

As Kesha is singing “Don’t let the bastards get you down” while I am writing down these thoughts on being you, I take it as the Universe telling me I am finally on the right path. For so long, I let others tell me who to be. How to behave. That I should not cry, be stronger, stop complaining. I will dress however I feel like, put colors in my hair, storylines on my skin. As I said before: being someone else is exhausting, so why don’t I just be who I know I am ?

This sums up everything:

And to leave you on a beautiful musical note:

You guys… you might think I am crazy because a few weeks ago, I purchased a Very Big Sketchbook. I first saw it on Facebook after Effy Wild shared about it on her timeline. You know by now that I have an obsession with journals and sketchbooks, and I have a ton of each (and still a good chunk empty).

Your words do not have to be legible

I assure you, they absolutely don’t. Your art journal is a sacred place that can be for your eyes only. Usually, when it is an art journal spread I know I won’t publicly share, I write as I’m pleased. Even when I want them to be clear in a video (for example), I can hide them in the first layers that will end up covered up.

Your art journal is yours, the decisions belong to you.

The saying “Hiding in plain sight” kept coming to me while I was creating this page. It was obvious soon enough in my process that this Nixie was a part of me that was actually always hiding, but right under everyone’s nose. Both here and not here at the same time.

Do you incorporate words in your art journal ? What’s your favorite method if you choose to add them in ?

Products used for this project:

✼ Very Big Sketchbook
✼ Gesso
✼ Radiant Rain mist – SNAPDRAGON
✼ Radiant Rain mist – GINGER FLOWER
✼ Stabilo mark-it-all – BLACK
✼ Silk Acrylic Glaze – KEY LIME
✼ Silk Acrylic Glaze – FOREST GREEN
✼ Oil Pastels

This is something most of us have trouble with. Dare. Dare saying “no, thank you“. Dare spending time alone. Dare go to all the places your heart feels called to explore (even if it means moving in a foreign country where you know no one).

I am sick of showing to the world versions of my Self that are untrue to my Essence. It is exhausting to be someone you know you are not, or not fully. So when your Soul says, loudly “no more bullshit. be true to you. stop hiding” you don’t have much choice than to obey the Inner Voice.

This is gradual in my life though. I got a tattoo at 16 (after two years of working it and talking about it all.the.time to my mom, who was against it. She went with me. And is still against all my tattoos), a nose piercing. Recently I finally got boxed braids with blue and purple. I now speak my Truths more easily.

In my creativity, it meant I needed to stop painting what I thought people would expect to see from me.

See, I am a pretty quirky and weird person once you know me. I am totally okay with it, but always afraid of being judged for it. My spirituality transpires in everything coming out of me. It is sometimes obvious, sometimes more subtle. Last year, when I began my 365 Nixies in 2016 project, I just let them come as they were; not judging the character, their features or their stories/messages. Most of them are odd but gosh, how I love them ! (psss: they are still looking for new homes).

Life taught me that it is way too short to walk its path in somebody else’s shoes. Mine sometimes feel too small, or too big, but they are mine nonetheless.

What are you doing to stay true to yourself ? It does not have to be big, like respecting your own boundaries for example. I celebrate all those steps you are taking to live the life you are meant to live.