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I always had been a scholar type of person. Always loved learning, in general. Life had been so I have not completed any degree/diploma after high school. I started plenty of education: to become a French as second language teacher, to become a psychologist (another passion of mine), to become a chef, to be a translator… but I never completed any of that for many many reasons. It is probably my biggest regret because it feels like a failure to me not to have finished University.

When I was in high school, I decided to come to Québec for a year or two as an au-pair nanny so I could attend college while having a home and a job. It did not happen as planned but I remember dreaming of going to University of Laval, then. This dream is not dead, after more than a decade.

I know I don’t need any diploma to work, it is one of the beauty of how it works in Canada. However, it would me a big win for me to go back to school, study something I love, and have a piece of paper as an achievement of that. Now that our daughters are older, they don’t need me as much after school so I could do it.

Working from home is lonely, especially since we don’t know many people here yet and my social life is quite empty. I am socially awkward as my 10yo would say, very difficult to go towards people to make contact in the first place. I want to this for me, even though I assume it makes me a selfish mom and spouse.

However, I am a woman of many interests. And picking an area of study to make a career out of it is the current problem. I don’t want to just go to college and do nothing from it afterwards so I am looking at what the market is right now, what jobs could I get. Decisions decisions…

Are you working in the area you actually studied for ? Do you have any diploma ? I am curious 🙂

After almost a decade of daily creative work, I gained some insight about who I am.

Journaling my heart out through writing (either the daily morning pages, transformed into “whenever pages”, or just writing when it became too heavy inside and had to get out out out). Painting in color so emotions would come forward, so texture would tell my secrets without me having to be loud and clear about it. Cooking so my family would know how much I care about them and their well-being, so I would feed their souls as well as their bodies.

I would do all that so I would not have to truly think and acknowledge what I was going through. 

Health has not been great for most of my life but nothing too serious until my teenage years. I won’t share into details but it changed how people were feeling about me, therefore it changed my vision of myself as well (because it is often easier to take what they tell you you are for true than going further than that).

It took my body to completely crash down in 2011 and to feel sorry and pitiful for myself to decide enough was enough. I was not even 30 yet and could not believe I felt like I was more than twice my age, that my body was abandoning me like that. I remember silently screaming that it was not fair. For two years, I almost lived in my yoga pants and leaving the house only when I had no other choice; it was that bad.

During that time, creativity saved me from going insane. I noticed that the less I was doing, the more problematic it was to hear my Inner Voice and to create anything. I thought I was fighting but was losing the battle because nothing was working. Until I pushed really hard, to accept my situation and let go of all the “should” I was filling my mind with.

I set goals and work my ass off to reach them

I decided to give gluten a break, as for refined sugar. Just to see if my body would be less inflamed. After all, why not ? It was not easy, especially as I am not living alone and that temptation is here all around.

It takes time to figure out a diet that is not so strict that it is not possible in the long run (I am not allergic to anything, so it is all about the decisions I make for myself, nothing is imposed on me). I tried being 100% Paleo and completed several rounds of Whole 30. But because I am not a meat lover and do not enjoy consuming meat at all, it is not suitable for me in its entirety. I tried to be 100% vegan but always come back to a bit of dairy consumption. I was hard on myself for not being able to fit into any dietary box until I said “f**k this, I will just cook and eat what I both love and is good to me”. I lost about 20kg (+- 44lbs) and felt GREAT (see picture taken in my former Teal Studio).

My creative life was at its zenith, daily painting/journaling was perfect. I was finally in my happy place, in all areas of my life.

And then we moved to the other side of the country. I stopped my daily walks in the morning (I highly recommend it, it helps clearing your mind, and to keep moving is essential when you have fibromyalgia), I ate whatever was easy and quick. The results ? The flare-ups came back stronger than ever, I gained 10kg and started to hate what I was seeing in the mirror. Back to square one. I did not paint or sketch for half a year. No inspiration, I did not even see the point of stepping into my Studio (brand new one)… The picture on the right is a recent one, I still do not like what I see BUT I am taking charge. Going to an amazing workout Studio 3 times a week with my husband since April, doing my best to get back to a healthier diet (bye bye Nutella) and not giving up. It takes time for fat to melt, I always had a very hard time losing weight and keeping it off but knowing it is possible is what keeps me going. And you know what ? I am painting again ! Nixies are back after a little break.

This is how reclaiming my body as my own is keeping me creative.

Hey guys ! thank you to all of you who entered my little giveaway and watched my video review of Danielle Laporte’s 2018 Desire Map Weekly planner. I loved hearing from you regarding if you were already using a planner system, what you loved about it. Don’t hesitate to continue to share with me, as I will probably keep talking about how I use mine.

I randomly picked a winner and *drumrolls* congratulations

Jay !!! I will be emailing you this coming week to collect your infos so I can ship this baby and other little goodies <3

Happy Sunday

I’m back today with my first video of this second term with ColourArte.

Today, I am fulfilling my abstract explorations obsession and share with you a technique new to me (technique discovered via Ann Osborne). Another current creative obsession of mine is adding blank spaces in my paintings, how the nothingness can still tell stories too. In this project, I chose black acrylic paint to contrast with the beautiful vibrancy brought by the Vivid Ultra Metallic paints.

I love the feathered look I obtained. Abstract does not necessarily means chaotic. That being so… you can somewhat control the chaos. I use straws but you can blow without anything to direct the air, or you could also use a palette knife or even a Catalyst blade. It’s all up to you !

Sunflower, 4oz Bottle, Vivid Ultra… [ CLR ] Passion, 4oz Bottle, Vivid Ultra… [ CLR ] Bolivian Blue, 4oz Bottle, Vivid… [ CLR ]

I am very fortunate to have been accepted again this year to be part of Danielle Laporte’s Desire Map Planner launch team. I hope you’ll enjoy this video where I share what I love about next year edition and point a few differences with the 2017 Desire Map Planner I’ve been using (good changes !).

I also have a giveaway for you ! I am giving away the grey weekly edition *woot woot !* Scroll down to know how to enter.

I am a Virgo, and this is where my love for planning and being organized comes from (and from a very well organized Mom too). I feel everything and this is the only planner I have encountered that is not only focusing on what needs to be done on a day to day basis but also helps me go inward to reflect on how I want to feel that day/week/month/year. So I can take the steps towards the spiritual goals I set to myself. It was weird, the first year using Danielle’s planner, but now it feels natural to check in and plan.

By using my affiliate link to buy your planner, you contribute to having great videos from me <3 Thank you for the love

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