Archives

Welcome to this new Gratitude Friday ! Feel free to share with me your (partial or full) gratitude moments in the comments; that way I can hold joy for you ✿ (you know that makes me happy to make you happy).

Brrr baby it’s colder and colder outside (we reached the -25C). BUT what is great is how appreciative of the warmth of our home we become.
Christmas holidays will begin next week, and my husband will have some time off so it means one thing: family time !!! Do you have any family traditions during that time of year ?

This week, I am grateful for:

• Cooking vegan food
• Magical oils
• Books that helps me deal with my own feelings
• Speaking my Truths via this blog
• Creativity, keeping my hands busy
• Bringing back my Soul Whispers intuitive paintings for you, so you can have a visible
• Celebrating my husband’s birthday and our dating anniversary
• Neverending learning
• Words and symbols and hugs

Welcome to this new Gratitude Friday ! Feel free to share with me your (partial or full) gratitude moments in the comments; that way I can hold joy for you ✿ (you know that makes me happy to make you happy).

I am writing a blogpost I will push public next wednesday and I keep reading, erasing, re-writing it. It is not an easy blogpost to share but I feel like it’s about time I do. In the meantime, it is essential for my sanity that I take some time each day to make a mental list of what I am grateful for. Either I do this, or I drown myself in my thoughts…

This week, I am grateful for:

• New creative ideas
• Letting my sadness go
• Books (I just finished “The Hate U Give” by Angie Thomas and started “Turtles all the way down” by John Green)
• Hugs, “I am sorry”, “I love you”, ‘You’re in my thoughts”
• Daily walks
• Going to Orange Theory Fitness with my husband 3 times a week, the coaches, and just moving my body
• Cooking what we eat

Good sound for your weekend:

Writing here can be difficult. I sometimes, like now, dread putting the words on the screen. Because it means everyone will be able to see them. To potentially judge me for them. But it also means that maybe, someone will recognize herself/himself in these words. This is what keeps me coming back. Sharing my stories. Sharing my art.

I recently put the word “depression” in the outside.

I have never agreed to consult a therapist, even when my Mom begged me to talk to someone when I was a teenager. To me, it was not depression then; I was a melancholic romantic. Obsessed with poems from Charles Baudelaire and Arthur Rimbaud, I was leaving what Baudelaire called ‘The Spleen”. If you are not familiar with it, here is what Wikipedia tells about it:

In French, “spleen” refers to a state of pensive sadness or melancholy. It has been popularized by the poet Charles Baudelaire (1821–1867) but was already used before in particular to the Romantic literature (19th century). The word for the organ is “rate”.

The connection between spleen (the organ) and melancholy (the temperament) comes from the humoral medicine of the ancient Greeks. One of the humours (body fluid) was the black bile, secreted by the spleen organ and associated with melancholy.

But almost 20 years later, I know I was deeply depressed. Something not many people know is that I almost killed myself once but an higher force kept me alive. Call it God, the Universe, my Higher Self, I don’t care; to me, it was my Aunt who died when I was 9. Depressive thoughts have come and go throughout my life. And right now, I think it is time I put them in the hands of somebody else. I wanted to become a psychoanalyst and started University towards it (see, I am obsessed with the Human mind…). Some days, the fog is so heavy I can barely breathe. I used to have panic attacks, especially when we were living in Paris.

But I found something that could help me heal on my own: writing. sketching. painting.

The pain is real. Painting it makes it even more real because then, I can actually see it. Years ago, I started an ongoing painting that I titled “Anger Management”. It is a wood board on which I let it all go when anger takes over. It is better that to kill somebody, right ?

Another way of dealing with intrusive thoughts is to put them all on a canvas/journal, and then cover it up. Make the hurt something beautiful. Burying it all under dozens of beautiful and meaningful layers.

Love is louder. This was one of my mantras this year. Something I repeat to myself over and over until I feel it as a Truth.

How do you deal with shitty thoughts ? I would love to know your own techniques of coping <3

Welcome to this new Gratitude Friday ! Feel free to share with me your (partial or full) gratitude moments in the comments; that way I can hold joy for you ✿ (you know that makes me happy to make you happy).

You guys, Winter is really here now in my Montréal suburb town. Last night, the snow was fresh and powdery while falling; walking the dog was actually really enjoyable et magical.

This week, I am thankful for:

• Laughter with my family, silliness
• Books (I am currently reading “They both die at the end” by Adam Silvera)
• Putting emotions into words
• Living in a warm home
• Knowing deep down that my Inner Voices do not always tell me the truth.
• The gifts we are able to do for our loved ones
• Getting my fingers out of my ass and doing what was needed to go back on the job market
• Music (I am currently listening to Kesha, P!nk, Willow Smith, Jaden Smith…)
• Comfort
• Possibilities
• Rest

Life has been hard this year, I won’t lie to you. Maybe I will talk to you about it, maybe it will only live in the pages of my journals (written or art journals). December is not the easiest of the 12 months but I decide to make it what I want it to be. My 12 years old daughter is glad we are in December for two reasons: she is now finally allowed to sing Christmas carols and she can start the Lindt Advent calendar gifted by our neighbor.