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Gratitude Friday is a weekly ritual I started in order to focus on all the small and big positive things that happened during my week. I invite you to join me, you’ll see how much being thankful can change your life. If you want to know more about it, read my introduction post.

Hello !

What a week my dear ! Rich in emotions, in hope, in waiting. In believing, trusting and manifesting.

This week, I am thankful for:

• Spring Break allowing me to emerge around 8am instead of 7am. It does not make fatigue go away but it eases the morning rush stress. And I like not having to go out when raining.
• It’s sometimes when you’re this close to give up that the Universe opens its arms and put what we needed on our road.
• My close friends, listening, taking time to ask how I am doing.
• It’s not raining every single day. Sucking on much needed Vitamin D.
• The realtors for their kindness and patience with our Girls.
• The Universe finally showing me I am listened to, that my prayers are heard.
• Not being in too much pain lately. Exhausted, anxious but the pain can be managed. It’s even a bit weird.
• I’ve already said it but I am fondly in love with the tv show Supernatural. Mix of humor as I like it, sarcasm, religion, family….
• This big big dream of mine that is taking shape unexpectedly (is that a word ?).
• YouTube videos showing hairstyles I can reproduce on my Girls.
• I received my Studio Calico order and I’m glad I signed up for their monthly kit. Because you can use all of it without being a scrapbooker.
• The women at Clipper Street.
• Cheridoo’s colleagues help.
• The recipe of vegetarian chili in Gwyneth Paltrow’s cookbook.
• Music that fills my days.
• The fact that I will have my art studio soon. I was waiting for this to come.
• I went over my fear of having people over in our home and spent a lovely afternoon with Melissa.

Do you have a room for your creativity ? What color are your walls ? On what do you create ? Ok… i’m just too excited. And I love to know about people’s space.

Oh, and here are a few recent daily moment pics:

If you wrote your Gratitude Friday on your blog, don’t forget to enter your NAME and URL below so I’m notified and can come to read you (you can also join by commenting this post):
[linkme]

Gratitude Friday is a weekly ritual I started in order to focus on all the small and big positive things that happened during my week. I invite you to join me, you’ll see how much being thankful can change your life. If you want to know more about it, read my introduction post.

Hello !

March is for us the month to celebrate our baby Koala birthday (she’ll turn 5 this year… and I secretely celebrate my half-birthday the same day, as when I was a kid).
March is also the sign that a quarter of the year is already gone.
For many reasons, I feel like this March 2012 is holding a lot of life-changing stuff. I think I’ve talked about it here in the past. But I am not excepting anything specific, just enjoying the ride. The famous “Now”. And this Gratitude Friday rituel, whether I share it online here or keep it for myself, is a great tool for that.

This week, I am thankful for:

• The persons who actually make an habit of Gratitude Fridays and sometimes share it on their space. Even when I am silent.
• I am learning to know the 20 other teachers in 21 Secrets (more info about it here. It starts in a month and it’s not too late to sign up. I will giveaway one spot next week). I know most of them, at least their names, but I have this feeling that this round will be extra special. I hope I am not wrong 😉 I am in the starting blocks to get everything ready.
• I love the short videos my friend Anu sends me. It makes me feel special and loved.
• I love the raw honestin in Liz Lamoreux’s blog. One day, I’ll gift myself with one of her jewelry piece.
• The email from Grenouille’s teacher. Reassuring. I know Grenouille is doing the best she can.
• I signed up for Studio Calico’s kits. I am not a scrapbooker but use a lot of stuff they use in my artworks. And I love to receive packages :s
• My last Nixie, Allie, is filling me with this je ne sais quoi I haven’t fully felt for some time. And I know that when this feeling is there, it means I am where I am meant to be and have done what had to be done. I loved writing her story.
• I want to create art journals again. Experimenting. Just having fun in the process.
• I will be able to get my certification to be a Certified Vision Board Coach. I have homework to do though.
• I will be in Mindy Lacefield‘s first online class. It makes me happy.
• The women at the scrapbook store Clipper Street begin to know me and what I like (which means I go there too often, I know). I even dared asking about the possibility of teaching at their boutique. YAY me for taking that leap of faith.
• I am one of the 50 lucky to have been chosen to test recipes for the second cookbook to come of Jaden Hair (from the blog Steamy Kitchen). I will try the first recipe tonight. Can’t wait.

I wish you all a wonderful week-end. Here it tastes a bit like spring break already because of the teachers’ strike (it’s a very long story…).

Here are a few pictures from this week:

If you wrote your Gratitude Friday on your blog, don’t forget to enter your NAME and URL below so I’m notified and can come to read you (you can also join by commenting this post):
[linkme]

I have to translate in english a blogpost I wrote in my francophone blog last week. Just a little something when I tell some truths about me you may not know.

In this blogpost, I admit I have been a suicidal teen. I think that makes me a stronger woman than who I would have been without this experience. It is part of my story, part I don’t talk about. Part not a lot people know about. Because, honestly, we tend to easily judge. And I don’t want to be judged by what belongs to my past.

However, in the process of healing, through art, I find that it does matter to speak my truth about it. So maybe somebody who needs it will read my words. So the Nixies that share a piece of this story do not stay in my personal closet. They need to get out and to be seen.

Amelia tells a little bit of that. And I was SO scared to share her and her whispers to the World. With a bit of retrospect, I am much happy she made her way through.

Tears are running on my cheeks.
This is still tender.
This is still hard.
And rough.
I wrote pages and pages and pages in journals, in hope it would go away. Yes, it is better out than in. But I tend to believe it will never really leave me alone.
The words were one of my saviors, as the words refused already to leave my throat, cumulating themselves there in a huge lump everytime I wanted to speak. I still can’t really.

This is why I love the symbol of the Phoenix so much, this bird that raises from his own ashes again and again.

My closest friends know I tend to be obssesional about stuff. This is how I discovered last year that Demi Lovato, who is an actress and singer, decided by herself to go under treatment for anorexia, depression and other non-fun stuff. She is now 22. And she speaks her truth. She decided she does not have to be ashame of it. She was bullied at school and started to starve herself around 12. This is when it started for me too. You’re still a kid, at 12 years old. Kids can be so mean. Words can cut you more than a blade in your stomach. They make their way in your head. In your heart. And they become your reality.

I want to share with you Demi’s song titled Skyscraper. It is beautiful. And her music video too.

A bit of the lyrics:

You can take everything I have
You can break everything I am
Like I’m made of glass
Like I’m made of paper
Go on and try to tear me down
I will be rising from the ground
Like a skyscraper!

I am not afraid to speak my truth anymore. Though I don’t want to put it all there. Just pieces of me in my art. I know you’d understand. And won’t judge me.

I sometimes think of myself as a Lunatic.

My mood goes up and down and up and down again. It is exhausting. And even if I try to stop it, all I can do is go with the flow. I don’t know if it is linked with my fibromyalgia or not, and honestly I don’t even care.

It feels like I am absolutely not in control of my feelings. Which actually may be just a truth admist other truths, no ?
Just so you know, despite the fact I was born under the stellar sign of the Virgo, I am not that much of a control freak. I am a lot of things but not that. Or not for everything (just have a look at my home mwahahah).

Today, something HIT me in the face. I was wondering why this week was so hard for me creatively speaking. How come none of the paintings I started brought a«WOOOOOW I so love this one» like it happened almost everytime this year. And then… I realized that this weird flower-headed creature that emerged today holds the key to my answers: she is different. In everything I do, she is different. The painting, my process, her.

And then I asked myself some more: but why does this feel so damn hard ? this is not the first time I do something different.
Yes. But before, I was the one chosing to step outside of my comfort zone, to explore things. Since «Fierce», I have this weird sensation to be more of a channel than anything else. I don’t know what will decide to show up in the painting until it’s actually there (it’s like that for my Nixies as well, though). I’m okay when it’s a Nixie, no matter what she looks like, but then I see it and freak out. WHAT’s THAAAAAAAAAAAAAT (you see the famous painting «the scream» by Munch… yep that is what I look like heee).

I realize that the reason why I am afraid when I discover it is a weird non-sense creature that is on my painting instead of my usual Nixie is because it is not something I am expecting. If that makes sense.

But I remind one of the biggest lesson I’ve learn in this lifetime: ACCEPTANCE IS THE KEY.

I learn to let go of my expectations.
I learn not to be afraid.
I learn to accept to be a channel.
I learn to love what I create, no matter what it is.
I learn to love the downs as much as the ups. Because this is what Life is made of.

This is my first participation at fellow Vancouverite personality, Danielle Laporte. I’ve been wanting to answer one of her burning question for a long time but of course, I never did.

Today’s question is just happening at a perfect timing for me (thank you to the Universe for your silly synchronicities).

Danielle asks a question on her website and simply invite people to share their answers.

I quote her:

When you establish your purpose for money, you have a rudder to help guide your purchases, investments, donations, savings—all the things that you do with money.
You also motivate yourself to go get what you want the most.

So… What’s my purpose for money ?

• Have everything I need/want to create artwork that heals me and inspires other.
• Own a beautiful home in Vancouver area. Spacious enough to fit us 4. To host family and friends. To work. Decorate it so it truly reflects who we are, as a family and a whole, and as individuals.
• Gift my close relatives and friends with what makes their heart sing to them.
• Buy organic on a regular basis.
• Travel and discover the World, even the close places. Visit family and friends that live so far away.
• Buy art that uplifts my Soul.
• Not to worry anymore to pay all our bills on time and still be comfortable.
• Have date nights with my husband once a month (= having a regular babysitter, paying for the restaurant etc)
• Make this big dream come true.