Some days, I just need to put that red lipstick I love. Just because.
And that galaxy leggin people find ridiculous. Who cares ?
oh and that Lindt heart chocolate that makes me sick but I wanna indulge in eating anyway (my choice) ? yes, was delicious despite the cramps and stuff after.
I have my share of bad days and tend to ignore them. But I know that ignoring is not the right thing to do because… well… it does not solve it. or make it go away. And when I am cranky, when I feel emotions I don’t understand or can’t put a name on, I snap. To those I love the most, the harder. And I am sorry. So very sorry. This life is such a huge learning curve. I do believe though that by focusing on the pain (whether it is physical or spiritual or mental or everything) just gives it power and force… so what is the balance in all of that ? Repressing is bad, basking in it is bad… talking too much about it and not talking at all about it are equally damaging.
I think that the first healthy step is to acknowledge the emotion and then find a way to process it. After decades of eating my emotions, after years of detructive thoughts, I know it is not easy but I know it is possible to find a way out, to at least keep the head above the water. Having a tight support circle is essential. People you can call whenever you fell that it is getting too much, without sugar coating anything, just as you are. It is not easy to let the walls down, and people in. But you need someone. We all do.
So today was about cultivating my happiness, filling the well again. I walked longer and different paths than usual. I ate a good fresh salad for lunch. Put my favorite matte red lipstick. Enjoyed a ginger beer (no alcohol) while painting, and a chocolate. I took a long bath (started a new book by an author I know the name but never read a book from, I think). And then I received the most exquisite handmade journals (one for me and one for each of my girls) made out of Disney book bards, hand binded, ordered by my Kindred Mindy <3 Thank you so much !